Okay, okay, not all of them...but I got your attention, didn't I? Well, I need to talk about this, because I feel like humanity as a whole demands it, and it seems like it's all around me lately. Why are women so awful to each other?
Why do so many women want to tear each other down instead of build each other up? Why do so many of us band together to promote negativity through gossip and complaining, at times even about those who are supposed to be "friends?" Why are we so quick to judge one another? Why are we so stingy with our grace towards other women?
Yes, I said "we." I've been as guilty of this as anyone in the past. Occasionally, I still am, albeit unintentionally. It's something I'm genuinely ashamed of and have worked hard to change over the past two years. I'm only sorry that it took a guy knocking the shit out of me (and the aftermath) to make me reassess how I treat people...I wish I could say it was Jesus or Buddha or even my cat that led me to change...but it wasn't. Maybe if I had read something like this, it would have inspired me...maybe it would've made me roll my eyes and think, "what a self-righteous bitch." I honestly don't know.
What I do know is that it's wrong. When we're sitting around gossiping and saying negative things about someone who isn't there, we are wrong. If we disagree with something a friend or family member says or does, and automatically judge them negatively for it, we (may be) wrong. (Assuming this person is not eating small children for breakfast or something equivalent.) If most of our conversations are about other (non-famous) people or certain groups of people...well, unless you're just effusively complimentary, it's probably wrong.
I'm not saying any of this to make anyone feel badly. I know plenty of people who never engage in this type of behavior at all...in fact, my one regular reader is one of those who probably doesn't even need to read this. (Love you, Sarah!) But if it makes even one person think, it'll be worth it.
Women face a boatload of gender-specific issues in society, and we deserve each other's support and consideration. Can you imagine how far we could go if we had it? If we would stop tearing each other down and start rooting for each other instead?
Someone very wise told me once that when you can't find something to like about someone, start with your common humanity and go from there. It's good advice. Maybe it's time to start giving other people with vaginas the benefit of the doubt. Stop being a bitch. Start spreading positivity. Today. Forgive someone. Show a little kindness. Compliment a stranger in a meaningful way. Better yet...start a conversation. THIS is what the world needs. :)
(If you're rolling your eyes and thinking I'm a self-righteous bitch right now...you're part of the problem.)
If anyone cares to join me at the domestic violence rally at the Capitol tomorrow, don't be shy! Have a great weekend!
Seems like titling that "Women are Bitches" is kind of contradictory to your message. It's perpetuating the stereotype that women ARE like that, when really it depends on the person, and males can be gossipy assholes too. I agree with the sentiment that women already face too many issues in society that we need to support each other! I just feel like someone who just comes across this and doesn't read the whole thing could potentially keep thinking shit like "see, even this WOMAN thinks women are bitches."
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ReplyDeleteActually, my point is that I DO think entirely too many women treat each other unfairly, and it needs to stop...I don't even fully exclude myself from this, although I try hard to be charitable. In some ways, I feel like society has taught us that it's acceptable, or at least expected of us...I even have encountered a handful of women over the course of thirtysomething years who seem almost PROUD of the fact that they're bitches and see nothing wrong with behaving in such a manner, as though it's their right as a woman. Or maybe that's just the excuse they hide behind...the vast majority aren't blatantly unkind, but I feel like many women often tend to judge other women harshly or treat them as a kind of competition, whether its intentional or not. But how much better would the world be if we afforded each other a measure of respect simply for being women? If we looked for common ground instead of pointing out differences? :)
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